Here's the first in the series I've been meaning to write for a few years....
Not as good as I would like but it's a start.
Recovering from jet-lag right now.
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
I feel like I'm on crazy pills
It's been a crazy few weeks of birthday parties and a lot of stuff. I have to put off a long update again.
A few posts over at printculture:
Collectivities
The Translator
A few posts over at printculture:
Collectivities
The Translator
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Friday, April 04, 2008
Traffic Cop
I guess the stress has made me overly emotional lately. I've started to become a vigilante.
In front of Aiden's school there's a very busy intersection that the kids have to cross. In the morning the "Green Moms" guard the crosswalks, but in the afternoon there aren't any guards. The immediate area has three schools very close together (elementary, middle, and high school) so you'd think that drivers would be careful, but they are not. I have already found myself shaking my fist and yelling at people for being careless in the streets around that area. Anyway, yesterday I waiting on the other side of the street (across from the school) as I always do, and watched the crosswalk light turn green and two girls proceed to cross. Then I saw a man, completely oblivious, driving through the intersection -- slowly, but without looking at all. I threw myself in front of the car and he stopped, startled. I started waving my arms, pointing to the two girls and the school. He held up his hand, like "sorry, my bad," but I just swatted my hand at him in disgust and stomped away. There were a few other nannys and moms on the sidewalk, so when I came back later with Aiden some of the kids were saying, "Aiden's mom, you were really angry, huh!" Stuff like that spreads fast.
Then today, I was crossing the street with Max and there was a series of cars parked on the side of the road, and a bunch of people campaigning for one of the candidates (#2, I forgot his name). (We have elections next week, and the candidates line up and blast all sorts of noisy messages all over the place.) I was grumbling to myself because they parked their cars ILLEGALLY on the side of the road, in an area where people often thoughtlessly park, causing all sorts of traffic problems in our already congested area, and making it difficult to walk safely. So I went up to the group of tee-shirted supporters and said, "Why is a law-maker parking ILLEGALLY?" One woman just smiled and said, "I understand." But I was mad, so I went on. "Do you understand that you're making it very difficult for all these people over here [gesturing to all the cars trying to enter that street] by parking there? Do you understand how dangerous that is? This kind of thing makes me angry, really really angry!" She just kept nodding and smiling (a bit nervously) and saying, "I understand, I understand," while backing away from me. I huffed away.
I'm going to start slashing tires next.
In front of Aiden's school there's a very busy intersection that the kids have to cross. In the morning the "Green Moms" guard the crosswalks, but in the afternoon there aren't any guards. The immediate area has three schools very close together (elementary, middle, and high school) so you'd think that drivers would be careful, but they are not. I have already found myself shaking my fist and yelling at people for being careless in the streets around that area. Anyway, yesterday I waiting on the other side of the street (across from the school) as I always do, and watched the crosswalk light turn green and two girls proceed to cross. Then I saw a man, completely oblivious, driving through the intersection -- slowly, but without looking at all. I threw myself in front of the car and he stopped, startled. I started waving my arms, pointing to the two girls and the school. He held up his hand, like "sorry, my bad," but I just swatted my hand at him in disgust and stomped away. There were a few other nannys and moms on the sidewalk, so when I came back later with Aiden some of the kids were saying, "Aiden's mom, you were really angry, huh!" Stuff like that spreads fast.
Then today, I was crossing the street with Max and there was a series of cars parked on the side of the road, and a bunch of people campaigning for one of the candidates (#2, I forgot his name). (We have elections next week, and the candidates line up and blast all sorts of noisy messages all over the place.) I was grumbling to myself because they parked their cars ILLEGALLY on the side of the road, in an area where people often thoughtlessly park, causing all sorts of traffic problems in our already congested area, and making it difficult to walk safely. So I went up to the group of tee-shirted supporters and said, "Why is a law-maker parking ILLEGALLY?" One woman just smiled and said, "I understand." But I was mad, so I went on. "Do you understand that you're making it very difficult for all these people over here [gesturing to all the cars trying to enter that street] by parking there? Do you understand how dangerous that is? This kind of thing makes me angry, really really angry!" She just kept nodding and smiling (a bit nervously) and saying, "I understand, I understand," while backing away from me. I huffed away.
I'm going to start slashing tires next.
Second grade woes, city assholes
I've been writing blog posts in my head but not on the computer lately. Haven't had much time to sit down and type, and the mental piles of post-it notes keep getting mixed up and covered up by new notes.
We're going to Shanghai next week to visit schools, though, so maybe things will calm down after that. Right now Aiden's under a lot of pressure to keep up with this school work (I will have more to say about that later), plus his English, since he has to test in English to enter the new school. That was harder than I anticipated. His speaking and listening ability is fine for everyday life, but his writing is poor, particularly his spelling. But on top of that he had to relearn a lot of skills in English. He does math every day, for instance, but in Korean, so we had to switch him to an English math word problem book. (The English-language workbooks are not as good quality as the Korean ones, I have to say. At least I haven't found one that I really like.) He had to learn vocab like greater than, less than, volume, mass, etc. and all the American units of measurement, as well as American money. That's a lot to cover in a short time. He also had to do a lot more writing. We ended up dropping Chinese, at least for now (he went from 3 classes + home practice everyday to one class a week currently). I decreased his schedule and he's still doing about 3 hours of homework every day. Much of that is his school homework. I will probably write more about this whole thing at some point, but in short, it's been a really stressful few months. And we're only in second grade!
Over at printculture, here's my latest post on City Assholes.
We're going to Shanghai next week to visit schools, though, so maybe things will calm down after that. Right now Aiden's under a lot of pressure to keep up with this school work (I will have more to say about that later), plus his English, since he has to test in English to enter the new school. That was harder than I anticipated. His speaking and listening ability is fine for everyday life, but his writing is poor, particularly his spelling. But on top of that he had to relearn a lot of skills in English. He does math every day, for instance, but in Korean, so we had to switch him to an English math word problem book. (The English-language workbooks are not as good quality as the Korean ones, I have to say. At least I haven't found one that I really like.) He had to learn vocab like greater than, less than, volume, mass, etc. and all the American units of measurement, as well as American money. That's a lot to cover in a short time. He also had to do a lot more writing. We ended up dropping Chinese, at least for now (he went from 3 classes + home practice everyday to one class a week currently). I decreased his schedule and he's still doing about 3 hours of homework every day. Much of that is his school homework. I will probably write more about this whole thing at some point, but in short, it's been a really stressful few months. And we're only in second grade!
Over at printculture, here's my latest post on City Assholes.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
odds and ends
Learning Chinese in Korea, a plug for the blog Strange Maps, and a rant on the movie Because I Said So.
No time for anything else these days; too busy being sick and doing elementary school applications for Aiden. Who knew those things would be so complicated?
No time for anything else these days; too busy being sick and doing elementary school applications for Aiden. Who knew those things would be so complicated?
Sunday, February 24, 2008
bath and body works
I had been thinking about writing something on the public bath for a while, and was impressed with the way this piece thought through the social meanings of hesitation. So when I wrote "At the public bath" it was with the intention of thinking through the meanings of rituals of the body. But as usual I hate the things I write right after I post them. If I didn't have a deadline I probably wouldn't post anything at all.
Friday, February 22, 2008
A little self-promotion
I am in the midst of writing my post for today and procrastinating by exchanging e-mail with Sandra, who asked me if I am the Jennifer Lee who translated her son's textbook, Korean made easy for beginners by Seung-Eun Oh. I've written before about the number of Jennifer Lees running around in the world but in this case that Jennifer Lee is in fact me. Seung-Eun Oh teaches at Sogang Univ in the Korean language program there and taught both Sandra and I. (Me- 5 years ago, Sandra - more recently) She's a great teacher. Anyway, that was my first translating job and I found it so difficult and time consuming that I've mostly erased it from my mind. But when Sandra mentioned it I went back and looked at the book and (even if the translation is not stellar -- you be the judge) it is a good textbook. So if you're looking for a good beginning Korean textbook, check it out.
Monday, February 18, 2008
6 month countdown
Been meaning to update the blog for a while but I've been busy. And still dizzy. And Aiden is on vacation AGAIN. What's up with that? They were off from late December to late January. Then they went to school for about a week and a half and got off again for the Lunar New Year. Then they went back to school for a week and now they're off again until the beginning of March, when the new school year starts. This school schedule is crazy. How do working parents manage it? If the vacation was all together I could have him go to camp or we could travel, but right now I've got him underfoot for two weeks while I try to maintain my own class schedule.
My Chinese classes are going well. I don't have much time to study but I am starting to think of words without as much effort and I feel like I've made some sort of breakthrough which is hard to describe. I can talk a little bit now without it feeling like a massacre of the tongue. I'm still slaughtering tones right and left but my newest teacher (they change every once in a while, which is always disconcerting because new people favor different words and it takes some time to get used to) told me I speak 标准 which is, I gather, a compliment. I should move up to the next level （高级) next month, and I'd like to add an HSK class too, but it looks like in second grade they still finish very early. Hmmm. Have to think about that. The electronic Chinese-English dictionary I bought in China last year broke so I had to buy a new one. The Sharp Korean-English dictionary I have had for the last 6 years or so has held up so well I almost bought another Sharp. (I actually put that thing through the laundry once and after it dried out it still worked perfectly. I love that dictionary.) But for Chinese AOne is supposed to be better, so I bought a Chinese-Korean/Korean-Chinese/Japanese-Korean/Korean-Japanese/Korean-English/English-Korean electronic dictionary for about US$120. So far I really like it, though I wish I could go directly from Chinese to English. But I'm having less trouble going from Chinese to Korean and vice versa these days, I must have gotten used to it in the last 5 months or so of taking Chinese with a Korean textbook.
We've been saying this for the last 4 years, but I think this is really the year that we'll move. We have about 6 months left. We've been spending a lot of time looking at apartments and schools online. I'm so thankful that KC can read through all the netizen commentary so quickly, because having the Korean sources of information about housing and schools has been really useful. Most English-speaking expats in Shanghai are on a fat budget but we are not. We're looking to live in a small apartment for not too much money, and we have to pay for our children's schooling ourselves. Plus we'd like to live near a lot of Koreans so that the kids can maintain their Korean socially.
In preparing to move I'm trying to strengthen our daily rituals at home. I think I'll write more about that later. I'm also compiling a "Life in Seoul" book for the kids to document our time here. I already make travel books for each trip we take, but this will be something different and it will take me several months to make.
I'm also trying to pare down our belongings once again, by eating up all the stuff in our kitchen, throwing away old clothes and toys, and figuring out what we'll take and what we'll ship back to the States.
Anyway, I have been holding up my end over at printculture though the results of my weekly posting are not always pretty. There are a few posts I would like to delete from my conscious memory. In case you missed these, I've written a series of 3 posts on signs in Seoul:
Reading the Signs
Reading the Signs 2
Reading the Signs 3
(The third one was not as well formed as I would like but its hard to write every week...)
I also had this short thing on cell phones.
Now I have to figure out what to write for this week... hmm...
My Chinese classes are going well. I don't have much time to study but I am starting to think of words without as much effort and I feel like I've made some sort of breakthrough which is hard to describe. I can talk a little bit now without it feeling like a massacre of the tongue. I'm still slaughtering tones right and left but my newest teacher (they change every once in a while, which is always disconcerting because new people favor different words and it takes some time to get used to) told me I speak 标准 which is, I gather, a compliment. I should move up to the next level （高级) next month, and I'd like to add an HSK class too, but it looks like in second grade they still finish very early. Hmmm. Have to think about that. The electronic Chinese-English dictionary I bought in China last year broke so I had to buy a new one. The Sharp Korean-English dictionary I have had for the last 6 years or so has held up so well I almost bought another Sharp. (I actually put that thing through the laundry once and after it dried out it still worked perfectly. I love that dictionary.) But for Chinese AOne is supposed to be better, so I bought a Chinese-Korean/Korean-Chinese/Japanese-Korean/Korean-Japanese/Korean-English/English-Korean electronic dictionary for about US$120. So far I really like it, though I wish I could go directly from Chinese to English. But I'm having less trouble going from Chinese to Korean and vice versa these days, I must have gotten used to it in the last 5 months or so of taking Chinese with a Korean textbook.
We've been saying this for the last 4 years, but I think this is really the year that we'll move. We have about 6 months left. We've been spending a lot of time looking at apartments and schools online. I'm so thankful that KC can read through all the netizen commentary so quickly, because having the Korean sources of information about housing and schools has been really useful. Most English-speaking expats in Shanghai are on a fat budget but we are not. We're looking to live in a small apartment for not too much money, and we have to pay for our children's schooling ourselves. Plus we'd like to live near a lot of Koreans so that the kids can maintain their Korean socially.
In preparing to move I'm trying to strengthen our daily rituals at home. I think I'll write more about that later. I'm also compiling a "Life in Seoul" book for the kids to document our time here. I already make travel books for each trip we take, but this will be something different and it will take me several months to make.
I'm also trying to pare down our belongings once again, by eating up all the stuff in our kitchen, throwing away old clothes and toys, and figuring out what we'll take and what we'll ship back to the States.
Anyway, I have been holding up my end over at printculture though the results of my weekly posting are not always pretty. There are a few posts I would like to delete from my conscious memory. In case you missed these, I've written a series of 3 posts on signs in Seoul:
Reading the Signs
Reading the Signs 2
Reading the Signs 3
(The third one was not as well formed as I would like but its hard to write every week...)
I also had this short thing on cell phones.
Now I have to figure out what to write for this week... hmm...
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
My mornings
Lately Max transforms into a grunting worm called "Jackbuh" who doesn't listen very well. But Aiden can make Jackbuh transform into a well-behaving worm named "Obi" or a nice frog named "Crackers" (or occasionally a kitty cat named "Helloah"). And from there he can transform back into Max. Getting ready in the morning is very complicated because I have to keep track of all these creatures; they won't listen unless I address them by the correct name, and only Aiden can reliably get Jackbuh to go through the stages of transforming into Max who can then brush his teeth or put on his clothes. Because hello! Animals don't brush their teeth or wear clothes!
It's a miracle we ever leave the house.
After waiting several weeks for an appointment I went to Vertigo Clinic at Samsung Medical Center this morning. I've never been to any of the big hospitals here (I delivered at Cha hospital which is much smaller) so it was an experience. The Ear Nose and Throat practice is in the new Cancer Center which is pretty fancy. Like Cha, everything is broken down into different functions and areas: check in in one place, wait in another, one nurse takes my history and enters it into the computer, then wait in another area, then the doctor sees me briefly, then another dr./nurse performs some tests, back to the waiting area, back to the Dr. who reviews the results, down to the special desk for making appointments for further tests (but no MRI, which is a relief, since I wasn't sure I could afford it), then to a consultation area with a person who teaches me to do special "exercises" to quicken the departure of the troublesome rocks in my ears, then out to the cashier to pay. All that in less than 1.5 hours.
My next tests are next week, then I have to wait until the 20th to see the doctor for the results. Since I'm not having many problems now I'm ok with waiting, but I wonder what would happen if my problems were more severe. Would I still have to wait so long?
Anyway, I can't predict a return to blogging quite yet because I'm still so tired all the time. But I have to post at printculture every Friday, so look for me there.
It's a miracle we ever leave the house.
After waiting several weeks for an appointment I went to Vertigo Clinic at Samsung Medical Center this morning. I've never been to any of the big hospitals here (I delivered at Cha hospital which is much smaller) so it was an experience. The Ear Nose and Throat practice is in the new Cancer Center which is pretty fancy. Like Cha, everything is broken down into different functions and areas: check in in one place, wait in another, one nurse takes my history and enters it into the computer, then wait in another area, then the doctor sees me briefly, then another dr./nurse performs some tests, back to the waiting area, back to the Dr. who reviews the results, down to the special desk for making appointments for further tests (but no MRI, which is a relief, since I wasn't sure I could afford it), then to a consultation area with a person who teaches me to do special "exercises" to quicken the departure of the troublesome rocks in my ears, then out to the cashier to pay. All that in less than 1.5 hours.
My next tests are next week, then I have to wait until the 20th to see the doctor for the results. Since I'm not having many problems now I'm ok with waiting, but I wonder what would happen if my problems were more severe. Would I still have to wait so long?
Anyway, I can't predict a return to blogging quite yet because I'm still so tired all the time. But I have to post at printculture every Friday, so look for me there.
Saturday, January 19, 2008
Lies I tell my kids
Lies I tell my kids is up over at printculture.We've gone back to the old format (more 'zine, less blog) so be sure to check out the other contributers' posts as well. Getting back to writing long posts (and more frequently) is hard but it is worth it to get to read what everyone else comes up with. I missed those guys.
I haven't been able to keep up the blog lately, just too much going on. The last 3 months or so I keep having recurring attacks of vertigo (probably just benign positional vertigo) which are pretty miserable. At worst, they last about 36 hours during which every time I move the room spins and I throw up. Sometimes, though, there are no symptoms at all. Last week I walked around looking like a drunk for about 5 days because I was constantly dizzy. I can't drive or exercise. All this makes me really tired.
The symptoms suck but there's probably nothing serious behind it, and for that I'm grateful.
I haven't been able to keep up the blog lately, just too much going on. The last 3 months or so I keep having recurring attacks of vertigo (probably just benign positional vertigo) which are pretty miserable. At worst, they last about 36 hours during which every time I move the room spins and I throw up. Sometimes, though, there are no symptoms at all. Last week I walked around looking like a drunk for about 5 days because I was constantly dizzy. I can't drive or exercise. All this makes me really tired.
The symptoms suck but there's probably nothing serious behind it, and for that I'm grateful.
Sunday, December 16, 2007
Vernacular Modernism
I was writing a message to someone the other day and said, "December feels like spinning on a roulette wheel." This week I sort of participated in my first kimjang (though I really showed up after my mother-in-law had done most of the work), Aiden took his second-degree black-belt test at kukiwon, KC had his company holiday party, Max's school called to tell me he has the chicken pox (I rushed there to pick him up and take him to the doctor but it was a false alarm, just a bad case of the hives).
So although I already posted this photo essay, I was behind and got it out quickly (which is why it reads a little haltingly) and realized belatedly I should have scouted around for more Seoul pictures. So if anyone has any shots of modern buildings which include traditional elements (images, roofs, etc.) that you don't mind sharing, drop me an e-mail at yunmay (at) gmail(dot)com. Thanks!
So although I already posted this photo essay, I was behind and got it out quickly (which is why it reads a little haltingly) and realized belatedly I should have scouted around for more Seoul pictures. So if anyone has any shots of modern buildings which include traditional elements (images, roofs, etc.) that you don't mind sharing, drop me an e-mail at yunmay (at) gmail(dot)com. Thanks!
Monday, December 10, 2007
long overdue
Well, this post is long overdue. I’ve taken a little break from my own blog, shame on me. I have written a few hurried and harried things for printculture: Weekend Thoughts, Manhwa (on my son’s cartoon habits -- features bad cartoons drawn by yours truly!), Consumer Thoughts, and Vernacular Modernism?. None are as well-written or well-edited as I would like (if you notice any errors let me know, editing is not a strength of mine, especially when medicated). But the last couple months have not been good for writing. I upped my teaching load, and while I enjoy teaching, it takes a lot of time and energy. I’m also still taking Chinese and looked (briefly) into taking French as well (more on the languages later). KC and I went to Shanghai twice without the kids -- our first times traveling without them -- which went really well, though we missed them a lot. And we’ve had a series of illnesses (everyone except Aiden, who is healthy like an ox), which have sapped my strength. If anyone has had experience with severe vertigo (recurring episodes when you feel like the room is spinning which makes you vomit, lasting for a day or two) let me know.
Saturday night the kids, my mom, and I went to a little blogger get-together hosted by Cat and Miguknamja from Seoullife where I got to reunite with Sandra from hereinkorea and meet Joe and Eun Jeong of ZenKimchi fame and Daniel of Epicourageous in Seoul. We had a great time. I haven’t been to any other blogger get-togethers; it is hard for me to get out at night, especially to the other side of the river, and was out of town for Seoul Man Jon’s meet-up over the summer. Also it was a rather long week, and I had lost a few pounds through illness so it was great to have an evening of indulging in the creations of foodies Joe and Daniel.
So although I was already feeling guilty over my long blogging absence, I felt even worse seeing all these other busy people who somehow are able to stay on top of their blogs.
I have really been enjoying Sandra's posts on learning Korean over the past few months, and I've been meaning to write more about learning Chinese. Other than when someone is sick (I missed 2 weeks of class when Max was sick) I am fairly consistent about attending class, unlike the other students, but I don't have much time to study at home and it is a kick my personal vanity to see that they are still better than I am (in my defense, they've all lived in China at some point). Studying Chinese characters from a young age also gives them a huge advantage. The other day we encountered "目的地” in a text and I didn't know what it meant. The teacher said, "목적지" and I thought, aha! So that's where that word comes from. The Koreans in the class (had they come to class that day...) would have known right away what that meant.
Two trips ago my father wasn't around so I had to bumble my way through restaurants with my poor mandarin. I did have an hour long conversation with a masseuse which went well, but conversations, I realize, are often much easier. You can go around the topics you can't talk about, you can partially control the flow of the conversation, and no one is in a hurry. When you're in a restaurant or store and need something done it is both embarrassing and difficult when you can't find the words, and people don't have that much patience to wait through frantic use of the electronic dictionary.
But this last trip I also realized how much of language learning is guerrilla learning. I was able to (thankfully) follow my father around and listen to what he said. When we needed to add water to the teapot I didn't know what verb to use -- put? add? give more? I used "put" and the waitress understood but I knew it wasn't right. My father used add ("加") which I immediately understood but associated with more of a mathematical context. Then when he wanted to ask the waitress to clear one place setting he used lift ("拿"). I would have thought of "clear" (like in Korean, 치워주세요) or "take" or something. In both cases I immediately understood what he said but wouldn't have known which word to use in those situations. So much of language learning is situational, which is why I become more and more convinced that the only way to really learn a language is to live in the country and speak it every day. My Korean vocabulary isn't all that great, I realize (since my Chinese book is translated into Korean and I often have to look up the Korean translations), but the words I know I really know well. In Chinese I've memorized a lot of vocabulary but I don't know how to use it.
The verb "可以" is another good example. I know it as "to be able to," but is used far more commonly that we use that verb. When getting a massage, to ask if the pressure is ok, they use that verb. Or to ask if something will do (in general) they use that word. It has more of the purchasing power of the English "OK." The Korean verb "되다" is like that -- I knew it first as "to become" but it used in so many ways, from "it's done," to "it's ok," to "that works" and many others. How would you learn all those uses unless you were listening to all the different situations in which the word is used? Like the English word "take" ("take time" "it just didn't take" "take a bath" etc.) these words are so hard to define and explain.
I find the whole process fascinating. At some point (though I really don't have any time) I became enamored with the idea of taking up French again. I took 6 years of French and used to speak it decently well, and it just seems like such an easy language next to Korean and Chinese (and Russian, which I took two years of in college and have forgotten completely). My Chinese class is so cheap (about 100 dollars a month for an hour class 5 days a week) I thought that while I have the opportunity I might as well take another. But I found that French is much more expensive and most of the classes are grammar-oriented (I wanted to take conversation). Oh well. I'm so behind on everything else it was probably a crazy idea in the first place. Mais c'est dommage.
Saturday night the kids, my mom, and I went to a little blogger get-together hosted by Cat and Miguknamja from Seoullife where I got to reunite with Sandra from hereinkorea and meet Joe and Eun Jeong of ZenKimchi fame and Daniel of Epicourageous in Seoul. We had a great time. I haven’t been to any other blogger get-togethers; it is hard for me to get out at night, especially to the other side of the river, and was out of town for Seoul Man Jon’s meet-up over the summer. Also it was a rather long week, and I had lost a few pounds through illness so it was great to have an evening of indulging in the creations of foodies Joe and Daniel.
So although I was already feeling guilty over my long blogging absence, I felt even worse seeing all these other busy people who somehow are able to stay on top of their blogs.
I have really been enjoying Sandra's posts on learning Korean over the past few months, and I've been meaning to write more about learning Chinese. Other than when someone is sick (I missed 2 weeks of class when Max was sick) I am fairly consistent about attending class, unlike the other students, but I don't have much time to study at home and it is a kick my personal vanity to see that they are still better than I am (in my defense, they've all lived in China at some point). Studying Chinese characters from a young age also gives them a huge advantage. The other day we encountered "目的地” in a text and I didn't know what it meant. The teacher said, "목적지" and I thought, aha! So that's where that word comes from. The Koreans in the class (had they come to class that day...) would have known right away what that meant.
Two trips ago my father wasn't around so I had to bumble my way through restaurants with my poor mandarin. I did have an hour long conversation with a masseuse which went well, but conversations, I realize, are often much easier. You can go around the topics you can't talk about, you can partially control the flow of the conversation, and no one is in a hurry. When you're in a restaurant or store and need something done it is both embarrassing and difficult when you can't find the words, and people don't have that much patience to wait through frantic use of the electronic dictionary.
But this last trip I also realized how much of language learning is guerrilla learning. I was able to (thankfully) follow my father around and listen to what he said. When we needed to add water to the teapot I didn't know what verb to use -- put? add? give more? I used "put" and the waitress understood but I knew it wasn't right. My father used add ("加") which I immediately understood but associated with more of a mathematical context. Then when he wanted to ask the waitress to clear one place setting he used lift ("拿"). I would have thought of "clear" (like in Korean, 치워주세요) or "take" or something. In both cases I immediately understood what he said but wouldn't have known which word to use in those situations. So much of language learning is situational, which is why I become more and more convinced that the only way to really learn a language is to live in the country and speak it every day. My Korean vocabulary isn't all that great, I realize (since my Chinese book is translated into Korean and I often have to look up the Korean translations), but the words I know I really know well. In Chinese I've memorized a lot of vocabulary but I don't know how to use it.
The verb "可以" is another good example. I know it as "to be able to," but is used far more commonly that we use that verb. When getting a massage, to ask if the pressure is ok, they use that verb. Or to ask if something will do (in general) they use that word. It has more of the purchasing power of the English "OK." The Korean verb "되다" is like that -- I knew it first as "to become" but it used in so many ways, from "it's done," to "it's ok," to "that works" and many others. How would you learn all those uses unless you were listening to all the different situations in which the word is used? Like the English word "take" ("take time" "it just didn't take" "take a bath" etc.) these words are so hard to define and explain.
I find the whole process fascinating. At some point (though I really don't have any time) I became enamored with the idea of taking up French again. I took 6 years of French and used to speak it decently well, and it just seems like such an easy language next to Korean and Chinese (and Russian, which I took two years of in college and have forgotten completely). My Chinese class is so cheap (about 100 dollars a month for an hour class 5 days a week) I thought that while I have the opportunity I might as well take another. But I found that French is much more expensive and most of the classes are grammar-oriented (I wanted to take conversation). Oh well. I'm so behind on everything else it was probably a crazy idea in the first place. Mais c'est dommage.
Friday, October 12, 2007
Letting Go
I've been writing this for a while and at this moment I kind of hate it, but I can't deal with working on it anymore. I need to get back to studying Chinese... That piece of writing has been causing all sorts of stress lately but more than that, something happened last week that has really been bothering me.
That is... I think I saw a dead body on the sidewalk. I was coming from the bus stop, headed toward my Chinese hakwon, and there were some men standing around on the sidewalk in sort of a strange way. Usually at that time of the morning everyone is in motion. I kept walking, then I saw the body. At first I thought it was one of those homeless handicapped men who crawl along the street on a board with wheels begging for money, but when I looked again I realized that this man was young, not moving, had a gash on his forehead, and wearing converse-like shoes, one of which had fallen off. He was mostly covered, rather hastily I guess, with cardboard boxes, so I couldn't see much of his body, just his feet and the top of his head. I couldn't really process what was going on at the time. A policeman was standing nearby, along with the other men, but all of them were standing back away from the body, not talking much. I kept walking, not really understanding, trying to figure it out as I walked to class. This was on Gangnamdae-ro, a busy street, full of people striding around. Because he was on the sidewalk I'm guessing it was not a traffic accident, and because of the time of day (about 9:30am) I don't think he was injured in a fight. I'm guessing he committed suicide by jumping from one of the tall buildings nearby. On my way back after class he was gone, but the police had painted an outline of the body on the sidewalk which I now walk around twice a day as I go to and from my class. Other people don't even realize it is there, they walk over the rectangle without even knowing it.
I looked at the news, and asked around, but no one seems to know what happened to that man.
Suicides are pretty common here, though, and don't often make the news. I was talking to my old Chinese teacher (who also works on Gangnamdae-ro) and she mentioned that she can remember two suicides just within our apartment complex in the last 10 years, from people jumping from the top of the buildings. And our building isn't all that tall, only 10 stories.
I hear about the high suicide rate but have been insulated from the reality of suicides, until now.
That is... I think I saw a dead body on the sidewalk. I was coming from the bus stop, headed toward my Chinese hakwon, and there were some men standing around on the sidewalk in sort of a strange way. Usually at that time of the morning everyone is in motion. I kept walking, then I saw the body. At first I thought it was one of those homeless handicapped men who crawl along the street on a board with wheels begging for money, but when I looked again I realized that this man was young, not moving, had a gash on his forehead, and wearing converse-like shoes, one of which had fallen off. He was mostly covered, rather hastily I guess, with cardboard boxes, so I couldn't see much of his body, just his feet and the top of his head. I couldn't really process what was going on at the time. A policeman was standing nearby, along with the other men, but all of them were standing back away from the body, not talking much. I kept walking, not really understanding, trying to figure it out as I walked to class. This was on Gangnamdae-ro, a busy street, full of people striding around. Because he was on the sidewalk I'm guessing it was not a traffic accident, and because of the time of day (about 9:30am) I don't think he was injured in a fight. I'm guessing he committed suicide by jumping from one of the tall buildings nearby. On my way back after class he was gone, but the police had painted an outline of the body on the sidewalk which I now walk around twice a day as I go to and from my class. Other people don't even realize it is there, they walk over the rectangle without even knowing it.
I looked at the news, and asked around, but no one seems to know what happened to that man.
Suicides are pretty common here, though, and don't often make the news. I was talking to my old Chinese teacher (who also works on Gangnamdae-ro) and she mentioned that she can remember two suicides just within our apartment complex in the last 10 years, from people jumping from the top of the buildings. And our building isn't all that tall, only 10 stories.
I hear about the high suicide rate but have been insulated from the reality of suicides, until now.
Saturday, September 15, 2007
Car-Free Day
I was wrong. I'm exhausted. Whether it is from Chinese or something else I'm not sure. Haven't written much lately.
But we're back on a schedule over at printculture... my latest post on Seoul's Car Free Day.
But we're back on a schedule over at printculture... my latest post on Seoul's Car Free Day.
Friday, September 07, 2007
a new hakwon student
I started taking Chinese at hakwon this week. When I went to sign up last week I originally tested to get into a MWF class, but after I took the written exam they told me they didn’t have a teacher around to interview me, so would I mind doing the interview over the phone? I jokingly said, “But the phone is so much harder!” Long story short, I did the phone interview the next day and bombed; they put me in beginning Chinese. But then there weren’t enough students so the class was cancelled and I had to do the process all over again at another hakwon. This time I did the interview in person and was placed in level 3. (I would have put myself in level 2...)
I’ve been watching myself go through this process and trying to observe what I can about the process of learning a language. I know from experience in Korea how much harder it is to understand a language over the phone. When I can, I do things in person, especially if it is something I’m doing for the first time: I go to the bank in person, go to the dentist to make an appointment in person. Once I know the people and have a feel for the kinds of questions I’ll need to ask or answer I can do it over the phone, but on the first try it is really hard. In person, I get all sorts of bodily clues, the person can see my expressions (and the fact that I’m a foreigner), I can make use of other tools if I need to. And although it may seem obvious it should be said that when listening to a foreign language one needs to be able to hear very clearly. Background noise, local dialects, mumbling, and idiosyncratic pacing (you know those people who suddenly speed up at the end of a sentence) are all things that can really mess me up in conversation.
So I was really proud of myself for going through the process of registering for a Chinese class in Korean. The test directions were all in Korean, I had to translate from Korean, etc. It wasn’t a big deal (I don’t often have problems with my Korean these days) but I realized as a froze during the test that I had been learning Chinese with an English book, and having to go from Korean to Chinese rather than English to Chinese was messing me up. Chinese and English are more similar grammatically, and when I read Korean the Korean kind of takes over. I found myself translating back into Korean without thinking.
The textbook we’re using in class is also, naturally, a book written for Korean speakers, and some of the vocabulary is hard enough that I don’t understand the Korean translations either, so I had to recharge the batteries for my Korean-English dictionary and carry it around along with my Chinese-English dictionary. There’s a lot of definitional triangulation going on!
The class is hard (I think I really should have been in level 2) but I don’t mind; I’ll learn a lot more if its on the hard side, and I really like the teacher, who is Chinese. She speaks about 95% in Chinese, which I really like just for the sake of learning but also because occasionally when she’ll clarify something in Korean it jars me. Her Korean accent is not that great and it takes me a moment to figure out which language she was speaking and then figure out her accent and usually by that time I’ve lost track of the conversation. I think I follow about 50% of what she says during an average class, though I have good and bad listening days.
This experience reminds me of the classes I took when we moved here, when good amounts of the dialogue would pass through my ears without me understanding what they were about. But I learned a lot of Korean that way, and most of all I learned how to listen. There’s a certain kind of state of mind you have to be in, I think, a sort of receptive, open state of mind, letting everything into your brain and not trying to too-actively tangle with it. If you start trying to consciously pick apart this word or that one you lose track of the flow of the conversation and then you lose the thread of meaning. It is hard to describe how this works exactly, but when I was sitting in class this week I kept thinking, with amazement and pride, that I can get into that state of mind very easily now, and whether it is Korean or Chinese I’m listening to, achieving that kind of receptive state doesn’t exhaust me the way it used to. I can see why they say that people who speak 3 languages tend to pick up new languages more easily -- your mind has been trained to absorb language and no longer gets so disarrayed by waves of input. I don’t feel overwhelmed, I don’t feel like I need to understand one word to get to the next. If I don’t understand something I just let it go and wait for the next one and make inferences. I don’t know my Chinese skills have improved much in the last few days, but the Chinese seems to come out of my mouth with less effort than it did a week ago. But I still don’t speak very well... it’ll take some time, and just as it happened with Korean, there will probably be times when I feel like I’m learning a lot, very quickly, and times when I feel like I’m stuck and not really improving. But I’m excited about the class and just fascinated with the process of learning, with observing the way my brain works.
But more importantly, I need to stop watching Prison Break, or watch season 2 really quickly, because its impeding my studying. We began watching while in the States and were quickly addicted. We’ve finished season 1, but there were several days this past week when we went to bed really late because of that show. Other than our Battlestar Galactica phase I haven’t really watched any TV in the past year or so and I had forgotten what a pleasurable experience it can be. And -- I have to say it, since I ranted about the disappointing kiss in Surgeon BongDarHee -- the kiss between Michael and Sara towards the end of season 1 was really, really good. What can I say? I’m American. I like a good onscreen kiss.
Kid updates:
- Aiden holds my hand until we get near the middle school (which is across the street from his elementary school) then suddenly he drops back about 10 feet and pretends he doesn’t know me. He’s suddenly very aware of these bigger kids; he’s fascinated with the way they get punished every morning. Actually, I find it fascinating too. As they enter the school gate they get checked for all sorts of stuff: the length of their hair, their skirts, the state of their uniforms, etc. If something isn’t right they get punished; first they sit in lines near the gate and later they either get hit or their heads or shaved or they have to do push ups or some other similar physical exercise (standing with arms out?). I haven’t stuck around to watch the whole process but it is kind of funny and grotesquely strange at the same time. Middle school kids here are like a different species. I was walking by the school one day and streams of girls were coming out crying; it turns out they had had an exam. Exams are a serious business.
- on the trip back to SF we were in Minneapolis for a layover and Aiden asked me if the population of Minneapolis was small. I didn’t quite know where that question was coming from, and started into this explanation about the relative populations of cities... and then he said, “Because it’s ‘mini,’ Mommy!” Aha. Got it.
- And then while we were boarding the plane he asked, “Mommy, why do men like women? When they’re adults, I mean?” Good question, little boy, good question.
I’ve been watching myself go through this process and trying to observe what I can about the process of learning a language. I know from experience in Korea how much harder it is to understand a language over the phone. When I can, I do things in person, especially if it is something I’m doing for the first time: I go to the bank in person, go to the dentist to make an appointment in person. Once I know the people and have a feel for the kinds of questions I’ll need to ask or answer I can do it over the phone, but on the first try it is really hard. In person, I get all sorts of bodily clues, the person can see my expressions (and the fact that I’m a foreigner), I can make use of other tools if I need to. And although it may seem obvious it should be said that when listening to a foreign language one needs to be able to hear very clearly. Background noise, local dialects, mumbling, and idiosyncratic pacing (you know those people who suddenly speed up at the end of a sentence) are all things that can really mess me up in conversation.
So I was really proud of myself for going through the process of registering for a Chinese class in Korean. The test directions were all in Korean, I had to translate from Korean, etc. It wasn’t a big deal (I don’t often have problems with my Korean these days) but I realized as a froze during the test that I had been learning Chinese with an English book, and having to go from Korean to Chinese rather than English to Chinese was messing me up. Chinese and English are more similar grammatically, and when I read Korean the Korean kind of takes over. I found myself translating back into Korean without thinking.
The textbook we’re using in class is also, naturally, a book written for Korean speakers, and some of the vocabulary is hard enough that I don’t understand the Korean translations either, so I had to recharge the batteries for my Korean-English dictionary and carry it around along with my Chinese-English dictionary. There’s a lot of definitional triangulation going on!
The class is hard (I think I really should have been in level 2) but I don’t mind; I’ll learn a lot more if its on the hard side, and I really like the teacher, who is Chinese. She speaks about 95% in Chinese, which I really like just for the sake of learning but also because occasionally when she’ll clarify something in Korean it jars me. Her Korean accent is not that great and it takes me a moment to figure out which language she was speaking and then figure out her accent and usually by that time I’ve lost track of the conversation. I think I follow about 50% of what she says during an average class, though I have good and bad listening days.
This experience reminds me of the classes I took when we moved here, when good amounts of the dialogue would pass through my ears without me understanding what they were about. But I learned a lot of Korean that way, and most of all I learned how to listen. There’s a certain kind of state of mind you have to be in, I think, a sort of receptive, open state of mind, letting everything into your brain and not trying to too-actively tangle with it. If you start trying to consciously pick apart this word or that one you lose track of the flow of the conversation and then you lose the thread of meaning. It is hard to describe how this works exactly, but when I was sitting in class this week I kept thinking, with amazement and pride, that I can get into that state of mind very easily now, and whether it is Korean or Chinese I’m listening to, achieving that kind of receptive state doesn’t exhaust me the way it used to. I can see why they say that people who speak 3 languages tend to pick up new languages more easily -- your mind has been trained to absorb language and no longer gets so disarrayed by waves of input. I don’t feel overwhelmed, I don’t feel like I need to understand one word to get to the next. If I don’t understand something I just let it go and wait for the next one and make inferences. I don’t know my Chinese skills have improved much in the last few days, but the Chinese seems to come out of my mouth with less effort than it did a week ago. But I still don’t speak very well... it’ll take some time, and just as it happened with Korean, there will probably be times when I feel like I’m learning a lot, very quickly, and times when I feel like I’m stuck and not really improving. But I’m excited about the class and just fascinated with the process of learning, with observing the way my brain works.
But more importantly, I need to stop watching Prison Break, or watch season 2 really quickly, because its impeding my studying. We began watching while in the States and were quickly addicted. We’ve finished season 1, but there were several days this past week when we went to bed really late because of that show. Other than our Battlestar Galactica phase I haven’t really watched any TV in the past year or so and I had forgotten what a pleasurable experience it can be. And -- I have to say it, since I ranted about the disappointing kiss in Surgeon BongDarHee -- the kiss between Michael and Sara towards the end of season 1 was really, really good. What can I say? I’m American. I like a good onscreen kiss.
Kid updates:
- Aiden holds my hand until we get near the middle school (which is across the street from his elementary school) then suddenly he drops back about 10 feet and pretends he doesn’t know me. He’s suddenly very aware of these bigger kids; he’s fascinated with the way they get punished every morning. Actually, I find it fascinating too. As they enter the school gate they get checked for all sorts of stuff: the length of their hair, their skirts, the state of their uniforms, etc. If something isn’t right they get punished; first they sit in lines near the gate and later they either get hit or their heads or shaved or they have to do push ups or some other similar physical exercise (standing with arms out?). I haven’t stuck around to watch the whole process but it is kind of funny and grotesquely strange at the same time. Middle school kids here are like a different species. I was walking by the school one day and streams of girls were coming out crying; it turns out they had had an exam. Exams are a serious business.
- on the trip back to SF we were in Minneapolis for a layover and Aiden asked me if the population of Minneapolis was small. I didn’t quite know where that question was coming from, and started into this explanation about the relative populations of cities... and then he said, “Because it’s ‘mini,’ Mommy!” Aha. Got it.
- And then while we were boarding the plane he asked, “Mommy, why do men like women? When they’re adults, I mean?” Good question, little boy, good question.
Monday, August 06, 2007
travel through the printculture archives
I actually posted this a little while ago, but forgot to link to it here...
Monday, July 30, 2007
Fortified Kids
We’re about ten days into our U.S. trip, in the second city. Aiden’s into his second week of camp (soccer camp for one week and now general sports camp for a week) and Max just started his first week of camp (gymnastics). Finally getting through the jet lag and beginning to be able to make sense of the world again.
Aiden has been incredibly observant this trip. There’s some kind of budding of consciousness that happens at first grade; suddenly he is acutely aware of difference and able to (sometimes) articulate it. Some of his questions/observations:
1. “Mommy, why do people in the U.S. live in houses while people in Korea live in apartments?”
2. “Mommy, how come there are no sidewalks in the U.S.?”
3. “Why can’t I ride my scooter to the store?” (he’s not used to having to get into the car for every little errand)
4. “Why are all the signs green, on the highway and on the street?”
5. “Wow, stuff in the U.S. is so cheap!”
6. (from the last trip, at the airport, upon being told that he had to stay in the women’s bathroom with me and Max until we were finished because the “rules” are different here) “Mommy, the U.S. is terrible!”
Language that he’s learned:
1. “What the heck?” (Now Max knows it too) I asked, “Where did you learn that?” From the kids at camp. He delights in the expression (perhaps because it rattles us) though he often uses the malapropism “What a heck?”
One day after I picked him up from soccer camp he told me how he saw an older boy pour some water on his face and then wipe himself with a towel, so he did the same thing. He told me how some people wear shin guards and some don’t, even though they’re all supposed to. I’m so impressed with his observations; I feel like, somehow, all this traveling back and forth invites him to notice and articulate difference. He very consciously studies and mimics the behavior he observes in other kids. I am fairly sure that at that age I was also acutely aware of my differences and did a lot of mimicking, but I don’t think I could articulate it the way that he can. Part of that may be the difference in the way we were trained to see the world; I attributed difference to some failure of understanding on my part; he has learned to distinguish language and rules (and name then as different) since he was a small child. He’s also mimicking the way KC and I talk as we move through these spaces and observe the people, the landscape, and the systems.
His observation of difference was occurring back in Korea as well. First grade has been a real challenge; as I noted in an earlier post, this year he’s started to become more self-consciously aware of the way that he himself is different (physically, culturally, linguistically, etc.). First grade has been challenging, not because of the work or the new school, necessarily, but because first-graders are so much aware of difference, so much more self-conscious, and so much more articulate. They hear what the older kids say and repeat, appreciating the power of the words but not understanding their effect. We’ve been having problems with teasing, with Aiden’s desk partner and his friends saying things like, “You write so slowly and your handwriting is so bad, you should go back to kindergarten!” Add that to his growing awareness that he is different (physically, linguistically, etc.) and he’s had a bit of a rocky time. He’s pretty even-tempered and he bounces back quickly, and in general he’s a social kid who gets along with everybody, but he is really hurt by the teasing. I had to have some discussions with some of his friends’ moms which felt like training for the diplomatic corps. I told them that I didn’t think (and I do believe this) that no ill-will was meant by the other kids; first-graders don’t seem to have much understanding of point-of-view, or much empathy. Aiden’s own way of communicating that he likes someone and wants to play is to go over and shove that person. He’s such a physical kid. I told him, “Not everybody likes that, they think you’re trying to be mean. I know that’s not what you intended, but that’s how your friends might feel.” So I think the teasing is something like that. His desk partner’s mom said that she tells her daughter, “Your writing is so bad” so that’s probably why her daughter repeats it to Aiden.
But that points to another problem; first-graders in Korea are beginning to feel the academic stress which will shadow them until they enter college. Part of the reason that Aiden gets teased, I think, is because he’s good at English and he can opt out of the system. And the way parents transmit their worries over their children’s academic abilities gets parroted by the kids and gives the kids reasons to channel stress through teasing. I was talking to a mom friend of mine about the teasing and she suggested that I assign Aiden more workbooks to work on his writing. If your kid is falling behind, time to make him practice more, to throw more stuff at him, so that he can be the best -- that’s the attitude. I told her, “No, I won’t do that -- that’s not the point. The point isn’t that he has to be the best at everything, or that he should do more work. He already does his regular homework, his math workbook, his English homework, and his Chinese every day. His writing has improved a lot, and that’s the important thing. I’m not going to add to his stress, or teach him that he can’t be less than perfect at something. I want him to play. I want him to spend time with his brother. I want him to understand that family and friendships are more important than schoolwork. I want him to learn that being a good brother or friend is a skill, and that you have to practice that every day too, just like reading and writing, and that that skills is more important than the others.”
That kid’s mom, my friend (who suggested more workbooks) has 3 boys and I suspect that the second son is stressed out because this year (he’s the same age, same class as Aiden) he’s taking (in addition to school) 6 hours of English a week (not including homework), piano, violin, art, soccer, and various other little things that I don’t know much about (workbooks where the teacher comes and does them or checks them at one’s home). I told my friend, “Don’t you think it’s too much? When does he have time to play?” But she said that even though she knows its hard on him, he can’t fall behind now, and that because they’re going to keep living in Korea she has no choice. I know where she’s coming from, and I can’t really disagree with what she’s saying, but I think it really sucks for the kids and I think in the end its going to have consequences. People think they can throw kids into this and that, adding skills to the kid like fortifying bread. That’s what we’re trying to make here -- fortified kids.
Aiden has been incredibly observant this trip. There’s some kind of budding of consciousness that happens at first grade; suddenly he is acutely aware of difference and able to (sometimes) articulate it. Some of his questions/observations:
1. “Mommy, why do people in the U.S. live in houses while people in Korea live in apartments?”
2. “Mommy, how come there are no sidewalks in the U.S.?”
3. “Why can’t I ride my scooter to the store?” (he’s not used to having to get into the car for every little errand)
4. “Why are all the signs green, on the highway and on the street?”
5. “Wow, stuff in the U.S. is so cheap!”
6. (from the last trip, at the airport, upon being told that he had to stay in the women’s bathroom with me and Max until we were finished because the “rules” are different here) “Mommy, the U.S. is terrible!”
Language that he’s learned:
1. “What the heck?” (Now Max knows it too) I asked, “Where did you learn that?” From the kids at camp. He delights in the expression (perhaps because it rattles us) though he often uses the malapropism “What a heck?”
One day after I picked him up from soccer camp he told me how he saw an older boy pour some water on his face and then wipe himself with a towel, so he did the same thing. He told me how some people wear shin guards and some don’t, even though they’re all supposed to. I’m so impressed with his observations; I feel like, somehow, all this traveling back and forth invites him to notice and articulate difference. He very consciously studies and mimics the behavior he observes in other kids. I am fairly sure that at that age I was also acutely aware of my differences and did a lot of mimicking, but I don’t think I could articulate it the way that he can. Part of that may be the difference in the way we were trained to see the world; I attributed difference to some failure of understanding on my part; he has learned to distinguish language and rules (and name then as different) since he was a small child. He’s also mimicking the way KC and I talk as we move through these spaces and observe the people, the landscape, and the systems.
His observation of difference was occurring back in Korea as well. First grade has been a real challenge; as I noted in an earlier post, this year he’s started to become more self-consciously aware of the way that he himself is different (physically, culturally, linguistically, etc.). First grade has been challenging, not because of the work or the new school, necessarily, but because first-graders are so much aware of difference, so much more self-conscious, and so much more articulate. They hear what the older kids say and repeat, appreciating the power of the words but not understanding their effect. We’ve been having problems with teasing, with Aiden’s desk partner and his friends saying things like, “You write so slowly and your handwriting is so bad, you should go back to kindergarten!” Add that to his growing awareness that he is different (physically, linguistically, etc.) and he’s had a bit of a rocky time. He’s pretty even-tempered and he bounces back quickly, and in general he’s a social kid who gets along with everybody, but he is really hurt by the teasing. I had to have some discussions with some of his friends’ moms which felt like training for the diplomatic corps. I told them that I didn’t think (and I do believe this) that no ill-will was meant by the other kids; first-graders don’t seem to have much understanding of point-of-view, or much empathy. Aiden’s own way of communicating that he likes someone and wants to play is to go over and shove that person. He’s such a physical kid. I told him, “Not everybody likes that, they think you’re trying to be mean. I know that’s not what you intended, but that’s how your friends might feel.” So I think the teasing is something like that. His desk partner’s mom said that she tells her daughter, “Your writing is so bad” so that’s probably why her daughter repeats it to Aiden.
But that points to another problem; first-graders in Korea are beginning to feel the academic stress which will shadow them until they enter college. Part of the reason that Aiden gets teased, I think, is because he’s good at English and he can opt out of the system. And the way parents transmit their worries over their children’s academic abilities gets parroted by the kids and gives the kids reasons to channel stress through teasing. I was talking to a mom friend of mine about the teasing and she suggested that I assign Aiden more workbooks to work on his writing. If your kid is falling behind, time to make him practice more, to throw more stuff at him, so that he can be the best -- that’s the attitude. I told her, “No, I won’t do that -- that’s not the point. The point isn’t that he has to be the best at everything, or that he should do more work. He already does his regular homework, his math workbook, his English homework, and his Chinese every day. His writing has improved a lot, and that’s the important thing. I’m not going to add to his stress, or teach him that he can’t be less than perfect at something. I want him to play. I want him to spend time with his brother. I want him to understand that family and friendships are more important than schoolwork. I want him to learn that being a good brother or friend is a skill, and that you have to practice that every day too, just like reading and writing, and that that skills is more important than the others.”
That kid’s mom, my friend (who suggested more workbooks) has 3 boys and I suspect that the second son is stressed out because this year (he’s the same age, same class as Aiden) he’s taking (in addition to school) 6 hours of English a week (not including homework), piano, violin, art, soccer, and various other little things that I don’t know much about (workbooks where the teacher comes and does them or checks them at one’s home). I told my friend, “Don’t you think it’s too much? When does he have time to play?” But she said that even though she knows its hard on him, he can’t fall behind now, and that because they’re going to keep living in Korea she has no choice. I know where she’s coming from, and I can’t really disagree with what she’s saying, but I think it really sucks for the kids and I think in the end its going to have consequences. People think they can throw kids into this and that, adding skills to the kid like fortifying bread. That’s what we’re trying to make here -- fortified kids.
Saturday, July 07, 2007
Friday, June 29, 2007
Frak
You know you've been watching too much Battlestar Galactica when...
1. You have dreams in which there are multiple copies of people you know in real life.
2. You spend time wondering if Kara Thrace is a cylon (I haven't gotten to the end of season 3 yet so please, so spoilers)
3. You find yourself saying things like, "Do you have a frakking problem with that?"
4. You neglect your blog.
Speaking of TV shows, I mentioned a while back that I was into that drama "Surgeon BongDarHee." Apparently it is based on Grey's Anatomy, which I haven't seen. My Chinese teacher who got me into BongDarHee was going through withdrawal and started watching Grey's Anatomy, only to be shocked by all the sex. Her description went something like, "So in the first episode, one of the blonde doctors and the brown haired main doctor sleep together, and then they find out that they're working at the same hospital. And then later some other doctors sleep together and spread a venereal disease. And then that doctor sleeps with someone else at the hospital... Jennifer, do doctors in the U.S. really have that much sex?"
Meanwhile, I'm watching BongDarHee and thinking, "Do people in Korea really wait this long before kissing? That might explain the popularity of the cold pool at the public bath..."
Our various cultural expectations of the role and prominence of physical affection are quite different.
Monsoon season has begun in Korea. The floor of our apartment is vaguely sticky, and I'm not sure if that's because of the humidity or something one of the kids spilled. Laundry doesn't dry properly. I find myself wanting to take multiple showers a day. The boys have all sorts of guck accumulating underneath their chins, in their underarms, and in other chubby spots. All of our umbrellas are somewhat dysfunctional, since they also serve as swords, canes, missiles, etc. Aiden's shoes emit a strange and unpleasant odor.
Anyway, my class is finally over and printculture is on a break so I thought I would have lots of time to get stuff done but it hasn't worked out that way. I did submit something for the next issue of Multicultural Living, so if you haven't subscribed, get on it! It is a great magazine. I'm in the midst of a bunch of other projects and trying to prepare for our next U.S. trip (involves getting us all up-to-date on our vaccinations, cavities, haircuts, etc. and preparing all the gifts). So sorry for the dearth of posts lately, but one of these days I'll get on it.
And more importantly, I need to get caught up on Baltar's frakking trial.
1. You have dreams in which there are multiple copies of people you know in real life.
2. You spend time wondering if Kara Thrace is a cylon (I haven't gotten to the end of season 3 yet so please, so spoilers)
3. You find yourself saying things like, "Do you have a frakking problem with that?"
4. You neglect your blog.
Speaking of TV shows, I mentioned a while back that I was into that drama "Surgeon BongDarHee." Apparently it is based on Grey's Anatomy, which I haven't seen. My Chinese teacher who got me into BongDarHee was going through withdrawal and started watching Grey's Anatomy, only to be shocked by all the sex. Her description went something like, "So in the first episode, one of the blonde doctors and the brown haired main doctor sleep together, and then they find out that they're working at the same hospital. And then later some other doctors sleep together and spread a venereal disease. And then that doctor sleeps with someone else at the hospital... Jennifer, do doctors in the U.S. really have that much sex?"
Meanwhile, I'm watching BongDarHee and thinking, "Do people in Korea really wait this long before kissing? That might explain the popularity of the cold pool at the public bath..."
Our various cultural expectations of the role and prominence of physical affection are quite different.
Monsoon season has begun in Korea. The floor of our apartment is vaguely sticky, and I'm not sure if that's because of the humidity or something one of the kids spilled. Laundry doesn't dry properly. I find myself wanting to take multiple showers a day. The boys have all sorts of guck accumulating underneath their chins, in their underarms, and in other chubby spots. All of our umbrellas are somewhat dysfunctional, since they also serve as swords, canes, missiles, etc. Aiden's shoes emit a strange and unpleasant odor.
Anyway, my class is finally over and printculture is on a break so I thought I would have lots of time to get stuff done but it hasn't worked out that way. I did submit something for the next issue of Multicultural Living, so if you haven't subscribed, get on it! It is a great magazine. I'm in the midst of a bunch of other projects and trying to prepare for our next U.S. trip (involves getting us all up-to-date on our vaccinations, cavities, haircuts, etc. and preparing all the gifts). So sorry for the dearth of posts lately, but one of these days I'll get on it.
And more importantly, I need to get caught up on Baltar's frakking trial.
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